If I Could Go Back in Time and Give My Younger Self AdviceâŚ
Advice to my younger self is something I would love to share if I could travel back in time. Iâd take my younger self out for a cup of coffee and give her a few funny but useful life lessons about kindness, setting boundaries, and learning to say no. After all, life is complicated enough without volunteering for extra drama! đ
Then I would share a few life lessons with her.
First, stop being too nice. Being kind is wonderful, but please donât run a free five-star emotional support service for people who wouldnât even offer you a glass of water when youâre thirsty! Not everyone deserves your time, energy, and endless second chances.
Learn to say NO. Itâs a complete sentence, not a government application requiring three signatures and an explanation.
Stop worrying about getting everything right. Life doesnât come with a user manual, and frankly, most of us are figuring it out while pretending we know what weâre doing.
Take chances, learn new things, laugh at your mistakes, and donât postpone happiness until everything is perfect. That day might be stuck in traffic!
And finally, Iâd tell her, âBe kind, but keep your boundaries stronger than your Wi-Fi password. Not everyone deserves access!â
Oh, and sunscreen! Because while wisdom takes time, sun damage is remarkably efficient. đ
Now tell me, if you could travel back in time, what advice would you give your younger self?
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Until The Next Whisper,
âRajeshwari đ§żđ
Š Nihshabd | The Silent Stories That Speak to the Soul. All Rights Reserved.
The Trouble with Being a Little Too Agreeable đ
People pleasing is one habit I wish I’d understood better when I was younger. Saying yes to everyone sounds harmless until you become the unofficial manager of a department you never applied to join. đ
Daily Writing Prompt: What’s one thing you know now that would have saved your younger self a lot of pain?
Before we begin, a small request: please don’t bring up my past just to sprinkle some extra salt on old wounds. I’ve already paid the tuition fees for those life lessons, and trust me, the course wasn’t cheap! đŞđ Let the syllabus remain closed!
People Pleasing: The Trouble with Always Saying Yes
If there’s one thing I wish my younger self had known, it’s that saying yes to everyone can sometimes mean saying no to yourself.
Every “Yes, no problem!” comes with the risk of becoming a permanent job description.
You agree to do one little thing, and before you know it, you’re the unofficial manager of a department you never applied to join. No salary, no promotion, not even a thank-you note sometimes. Just unlimited responsibilities and the occasional “You don’t mind, do you?”
Oh, the things we do to maintain our excellent reputation as the person who never says no! đ
The worst part? I still haven’t learnt my lesson.
Even today, before saying no, I mentally prepare for the other person’s disappointment, rehearse explanations they haven’t asked for, and occasionally say yes just to avoid making things awkward.
Apparently, my mouth has a faster response time than my brain. My brain is still reviewing the request while my mouth has already signed the contract.
People Pleasing and the Fear of Disappointing Others
And God forbid someone should feel bad! What if they misunderstand me? What if they think I’ve changed? What if they’re upset with me?
Meanwhile, I’m sitting there feeling exhausted over a commitment I voluntarily agreed to, wondering why my life suddenly resembles a customer care department that never closes.
Honestly, I deserve a customer satisfaction award. The only dissatisfied customer, however, is me. đ
Perhaps this is one thing I wish my younger self had known: people change, and so do you.
The things you once did without a second thought may eventually feel like obligations you can no longer carry so easily. Your priorities change. Your energy changes. Even your understanding of what it means to be a good person changes.
And that’s okay.
People Pleasing: You Cannot Control Everything
You cannot control how people react, what they think of you, or whether everyone approves of your decisions.
You can explain yourself with the precision of a lawyer presenting a case in the Supreme Court, and someone might still misunderstand you.
Congratulations! You’ve just wasted three hours preparing a defence for a crime you didn’t commit. đ
I wish I had understood earlier that saying no doesn’t automatically make you rude, selfish, or a terrible human being.
Sometimes, it simply means you have other things to do. Sometimes, it means you’re tired. And sometimes, it means you’d genuinely prefer to sit quietly with a cup of coffee rather than add another item to your never-ending to-do list.
A revolutionary concept, I know!
Learning to Say No Without Feeling Guilty
Old habits are stubborn little creatures, especially the ones people have grown accustomed to.
When you’ve always been the person who agrees, even a perfectly reasonable no can feel like a shocking plot twist.
And perhaps that’s the hardest partânot learning to say no, but accepting that someone might not like the new version of you.
Still, I have a soft spot for my younger self, who said yes so easily.
She wasn’t foolish. She was trying to be considerate, to be helpful, and to make things easier for everyone around her. She just hadn’t figured out that she was allowed to include herself in that everyone.
I wouldn’t scold her for it. I’d probably give her a hug, offer her a cup of coffee, and gently suggest that the next time someone asks for a favour, she try saying, “Let me think about it.”
Baby steps. We’re not performing miracles here. đ
And if I ever master this skill, please don’t expect an announcement. I’ll be too busy learning how to say no to the people asking me to explain why I’ve suddenly learnt to say no.
Some habits are hard to break. Especially the ones that come with excellent customer service, a generous heart, and absolutely no cancellation policy. đđ¤
P.S. If you’re reading this and thinking of asking me for a favour, please allow me at least three to five business days to consult my brain before my mouth responds.
Let’s Talk! đŹ
Are you also someone who says yes before your brain has had a chance to review the terms and conditions? đ
Have you ever agreed to do something and immediately regretted it?
Tell me in the comments. Let’s see how many of us are running an unpaid customer care department without even knowing it!
And if this made you smile, share it with someone who needs a gentle reminder that saying no doesn’t make them a bad person. đŚđ¤
Until The Next Whisper,
âRajeshwari đ§żđ
Š Nihshabd | The Silent Stories That Speak to the Soul. All Rights Reserved.
Self Discovery Through Relationships: Life Lessons Iâve Learned
If you ask me which relationship has taught me the most about myself, I honestly wouldn’t know where to begin. For me, self discovery has happened slowly, through the people I have met and the relationships I have shared with them. Everyone I have met in my life has taught me something.
Every person has left a little piece of themselves with me. Some taught me patience, some confidence, some boundaries, some kindness, and some showed me what I should never repeat. And some simply taught me that not every little thing deserves my time and energy.
I have kept all these little lessons with meânot because I want to live in the past, but because if life ever takes me back to the same situation, I want them to remind me, âWait⌠haven’t we been here before?â đ
Life Lessons and Self Discovery Through Relationships  đŚ
Life is short, and honestly, there are already enough real problems to deal with. So I have learned to appreciate the small things and let the little things go.
A cup of coffee made for me, a thoughtful message, a good conversation, a silly joke, or simply a peaceful eveningâthese little moments matter.
I have also learned to celebrate small moments. Not everything needs to be a big achievement to deserve a little happiness.
And kindness matters too. You never really know what someone else is going through, so if a little patience or a kind word can make someone’s day easier, why not?
Everyone I meet teaches me something. Some stay for years, some for a season, and some leave behind just one lesson.
And perhaps that is what makes relationships such an important part of self discovery.
What My Children Taught Me About Self Discovery đŚ
But if I have to choose one relationship that has taught me the most about myself, it would be my relationship with my children.
They gave me my childhood back.
They taught me patience, confidence, how to be more tech-savvy, and even turned me into a gamer. đ They have corrected my pronunciation more times than I care to admit. đ
But one of the biggest things they taught me was to laugh loudly.
You know how girls are often told, âDon’t laugh so loudly. You’re a girl.â
Well⌠I don’t listen anymore.
I laugh properly. Loudly. Without checking who is watching.
And the funniest part?
My mother has also entered the same zone now. đ
So between my children and my mother, I think the âgirls should behave properlyâ department has officially lost the battle in our family. đ
Finding Yourself Again Through Motherhood đŚ
After becoming a mother, somewhere along the way, I forgot that I was also a person outside of being a mother.
I had choices too. Dreams, likes, dislikes, silly little wishes and a life of my own.
When you’re busy taking care of everyone else, you sometimes forget to ask yourself, âWhat do I want?â
My children somehow helped me find that answer again.
They taught me to stand up for myself, live for myself, take time for myself and, most importantly, meet myself again.
They reminded me that being a mother doesn’t mean losing the woman you were before motherhood.
And that has been one of the most beautiful parts of my self discovery journey.
Self Love, Laughter and a Little Princess Treatment đŚ
And let’s not forgetâthere are three boys in my house, and one of them is my husband. đ
So technically, I am the only girl in the house.
Which obviously means I get my share of princess treatment. đđ
And honestly, I am not complaining.
They tolerate my moods, listen to my nonsense, put up with my nakhre and somehow make everyday life a little more fun.
They have also taught me that self love doesn’t always have to be serious.
Sometimes it is taking an hour for yourself. Sometimes it is learning something new, laughing until your stomach hurts, enjoying your favourite things, or simply appreciating the little moments.
The Biggest Lesson in My Self Discovery Journey đŚ
When I look back, I realise that every relationship has added something to who I am today.
I have learned from the people who stayed, the people who left, the relationships that worked and the ones that didn’t.
But my children taught me something different.
They didn’t just teach me how to be a better mother.
They reminded me how to be me.
I can still be silly. I can still have choices. I can still laugh loudly. I can still learn. I can still make time for myself.
And perhaps that’s what makes relationships so special.
They donât just teach you something about life. Sometimes, they quietly bring you back to yourself.
What About You?
Which relationship has taught you the most about yourself?
Was there someone who helped you discover a part of yourself you had forgotten? Iâd love to hear your story. đ¤
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Until The Next Whisper,
âRajeshwari đ§żđ
Š NihshabdThe Silent Stories That Speak to the Soul. All Rights Reserved.
Whatâs the best piece of advice youâve ever received?
Done Is Better Than Perfect: The Advice That Helped Me Overcome Perfectionism
Done is better than perfect is the best piece of advice I have ever received. It completely changed my creative journey and taught me that overcoming perfectionism isnât about becoming flawlessâitâs about having the courage to begin.
I didnât learn this lesson from a book or a motivational quote.
I learned it from my mentor⌠and one imperfect illustration that I almost never shared.
Why I Was Afraid to Share My First Digital Illustrationâ¨
If there is one piece of advice that quietly changed my life, it was this:
âDone is better than perfect.â
When I joined my digital fashion illustration course, I had one tiny problem.
Actually⌠several tiny problems.
I knew hand illustration.
I knew nothing about Photoshop.
And laptops?
Letâs just say, if technology were a language, Iâd still be stuck at A for Apple. đ
Then came our first digital illustration assignment.
After wrestling with layers, tracing, brushes, and enough confusion to question all my life choices, I somehow managed to create my very first digital portrait.
It wasnât great.
It wasnât even âalmost great.â
Letâs just say⌠my portrait and the original model looked like they belonged to two completely different families. đ
I proudly sent it to my mentor.
She looked at it and said,
âWonderful. Now post it on social media.â
Excuse me⌠WHAT?
I immediately replied,
âMaâam, I canât! People will laugh. Theyâll wonder what exactly Iâve illustrated.â
The Advice That Changed My Perspectiveâ¨
Thatâs when she said something Iâll never forget.
âIf you keep waiting for perfection, youâll miss the entire journey that leads to it.â
She continued,
âNothing starts perfect. Even ten years from now, youâll look at your work and find something youâd improve. Perfection isnât a destination you suddenly reach one day. Itâs simply the result of showing up, making mistakes, learning from them, and doing it again.â
And then came the line that stayed with me.
âYou can only improve what youâre willing to show.â
This wasnât perfect. But posting it was the most perfect decision I made.
How I Started Overcoming Perfectionismâ¨
That day, I understood something.
Perfection doesnât build confidence.
Action does.
The funny part?
If I had waited until I felt âgood enough,â Iâd probably still be staring at that same unfinished illustration⌠while Photoshop continued staring back at me. đ
Today, when I look at that first design, I smile.
Not because itâs perfect.
But because it exists.
It reminds me that every piece of work I create today began with one imperfect attempt that I almost never shared.
Why Done Is Better Than Perfectâ¨
Perfection is a moving target.
No matter how experienced we become, there will always be something weâd like to improve.
The real magic isnât in creating something perfect.
Itâs in creating something at all.
Every finished piece teaches us something.
Every imperfect attempt makes us better.
Every mistake becomes a lesson we couldnât have learned by waiting.
Perfection never arrived. Progress did.
My Biggest Lesson as a Creativeâ¨
So hereâs my little reminder for anyone waiting for the âperfect time.â
Post it.
Write it.
Paint it.
Start it.
Because unfinished dreams hidden in drafts never become success stories.
Sometimes, done really is better than perfect.
And for that lesson, Iâll always be grateful to my mentor, who saw possibility in me long before I could see it in myself.
This illustration didnât build my confidence.
Sharing it did.
Looking at it today, I donât remember the fear.
I remember the moment I chose progress over perfection.
Now Iâm curious⌠whatâs one thing youâve been waiting to share because youâre afraid it isnât perfect yet? Iâd love to hear your story. đ¤đŚ
Whatâs something you used to worry about but donât anymore?
WordPress really made me stop and think today.
The Day I Stopped Chasing Butterflies wasnât a title I planned.
It all began with one simple prompt:
âWhatâs something you used to worry about but donât anymore?â
Poor WordPress.
It asked one tiny questionâŚ
âŚbut life handed me a much longer answer. đ
I think being a woman teaches you certain lessons much earlier than you expect. And honestly, not just womenâlife has a funny way of teaching all of us, whether we signed up for the class or not.
So hereâs my little listâŚ
Or maybe not a list.
More like a collection of things I quietly stopped carrying.
I stopped worrying so much about⌠people.
What will people think?
I spent years editing myself before speaking.
One day I realized most people werenât even reading my scriptâthey were busy rehearsing their own.
Turns out, people have their own lives, their own problems, and their own endless to-do lists. Theyâre not running a 24/7 surveillance team dedicated to me.
What a relief. đ
Making everyone happy.
I tried. Really, I did.
Then I realized itâs like charging everyoneâs phone while your own battery is at 2%.
Someone is always going to be unhappy.
These days, if Iâm smiling, I call it a successful day.
Outgrowing people.
I used to believe every friendship had to last forever.
Now I know some people are chapters, not the whole book.
They came, they taught me something, and they moved on.
Thatâs not failureâŚ
Thatâs life.
I stopped worrying so much about⌠myself.
There was a time when saying âI donât knowâ felt like admitting defeat.
Now it feels like honesty.
Even Google occasionally says, âNo results found.â đ
I also stopped worrying about changing my mind.
If people say, âYouâve changed,â my first thought isâŚ
âI certainly hope so.â
Software that never updates eventually crashes.
Humans arenât any different.
And donât even get me started on productivity.
I used to feel guilty for resting.
Now I know even my phone demands to be charged before it starts complaining.
Why should humans be any different?
And finally⌠I stopped worrying so much about life itself.
Every closed door once felt like the end of the world.
Now I just assume life saved me from walking into the wrong room.
Whatâs meant for me usually has a funny habit of finding me anyway.
I also made peace with silence.
Earlier, every quiet moment felt awkward.
Now silence often says more than words ever could.
And starting over?
That one doesnât scare me anymore either.
Beginning again doesnât mean starting from scratch.
Experience quietly packs its bags and comes along for the ride.
So no matter how many times life says,
âStart againâŚâ
I know Iâm never truly starting from zero.
Somewhere along the wayâŚ
I learned how to live.
Not because life suddenly became easier.
But because I slowly stopped expecting happiness to arrive one fine morning, ring the doorbell, and politely introduce itself.
I spent years chasing happiness.
Running after people.
Running after approval.
Running after expectations.
Running after that imaginary moment when everything would finally be perfect.
Then one day I realized something that changed everything.
If you want butterflies, you donât spend your life chasing butterflies. You build a garden where butterflies would want to stay.
Maybe happiness works the same way.
The Day I Stopped Chasing Butterflies đŚ
So instead of chasing everyone and everything, I started creating a life that feels like home to me.
A little embroidery.
A little gardening.
Digital illustration.
Writing.
Music playing in the background.
Dancing in the kitchen while waiting for the tea to boil.
Painting when words arenât enough.
Getting lost in a good suspense thriller.
Spending unhurried time with my family.
Playing Ludo together and laughing over the silliest things.
Years from now, I donât think weâll remember who won the Ludo game⌠but weâll definitely remember who was sitting around the board. đ¤
Maybe every home deserves a tiny family ritual.
It doesnât have to be anything grand.
A board game.
An evening cup of tea.
A short walk.
Even simply a little time together.
Sometimes, the smallest rituals become the biggest memories.
Tiny moments.
Simple joys.
Nothing extraordinary.
Yet somehowâŚ
They make ordinary days feel beautiful.
Maybe thatâs what happiness looked like all along.
Does that mean I never worry anymore?
Of course not.
(Okay okay⌠some things still sting. Iâm not a saint. đ)
But now I know where to return when life becomes too loud.
Sometimes I even wonderâŚ
Have I finally achieved moksha?
Then someone cuts me off in traffic, my Wi-Fi stops working, or an online order gets delayedâŚ
âŚand Iâm immediately remindedâ
Nope. Still very much attached to worldly things. đ
Now Iâm curiousâŚ
Whatâs something you used to worry about⌠but donât anymore?
Or tell me thisâŚ
What do you do to worry a little less⌠and live a little more?đ¤
Iâd genuinely love to hear your answer in the comments. đŚâ¨
If you had to give one life-changing tip, what would it be?
Donât Quit. Just Turn the Page.
If I had to give one life-changing tip⌠Iâd cheat and give you two. đ
Because following instructions has never been my strongest personality trait.
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Tip #1: Donât give up.
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I know. It sounds like something youâd find on a coffee mug.
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But hear me out.
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Sometimes we donât quit because weâre tired. We quit because we convince ourselves that one rejection, one failure, one closed door is the universe politely saying, âSorry, youâre not the main character.â
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What if itâs just saying, âWrong door. Try the one next to it.â
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Not getting that job doesnât mean you wonât find your work. Not getting that relationship doesnât mean love packed its bags forever. Not succeeding this time doesnât mean youâre bad at it.
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It just means⌠the plot needed a twist..
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Even Wi-Fi disconnects sometimes. It doesnât mean you throw away the router. đ
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Tip #2: Sometimes life asks you to change the path, not your determination. đŚ
Donât give up on your dream too quickly.
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Fight for it.
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Work hard for it.
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Give it everything youâve got.
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But if youâve truly given it your best and life still keeps pushing you in another direction donât spend your whole life standing outside one closed door.
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Sometimes, changing the path doesnât mean giving up on the destination.
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Life isnât written with permanent ink. đŚ
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Itâs more like a sketchbook.
You can erase. You can redraw. You can scribble over the ugly part. You can turn a mistake into a cloud, a tree, or somehow⌠a very artistic potato. đ¨đĽ
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Our lives are blank canvases that keep handing us fresh space to paint on.
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Didnât like Chapter 3?
.
Good news.
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Nobody is stopping you from writing an amazing Chapter 4.
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So if today feels heavyâŚ
Take a deep breath.
Sharpen your pencil.
Turn the page.
Start again.
Not because your dream wasnât worth fighting forâŚ
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But because sometimes life isnât rejecting you.
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Itâs simply redirecting you.
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So hereâs my not-so-secret life advice:
Donât give up.
Donât give up on yourself either.
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Because as long as youâre breathing, your story is still accepting edits.
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And who knows?
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The chapter youâre worrying about today might become your favorite plot twist tomorrow. đ¤đŚ
Who is the fictional character you relate to the most?
One Character? Really?
Who is the fictional character you relate to the most?
I hate this question.
Not because I donât have an answerâŚ
But because it expects me to have just one.
Seriously?
Thatâs like asking an artist to choose one colour⌠or asking a writer to pick one favourite word.
Life doesnât make us that simple.
Just when I think Iâve found the fictional character I relate to the most, another one quietly taps me on the shoulder and says,
âExcuse me⌠youâve borrowed a little piece of me too.â
And annoyinglyâŚ
Sheâs right.
Why choose one⌠when life lets you become many?â đŚ
A little bit of Jo March lives in me every time my thoughts refuse to stay inside my head until I write them down. Sometimes writing feels less like a hobby and more like breathing.
Then thereâs Belle. We definitely have one thing in commonâwe can both disappear into books and completely forget that the real world exists. The only difference is that she had a magical library. I have a growing collection of books⌠and a family occasionally reminding me that food exists outside the pages. đ
And then comes Rapunzel, happily throwing a hundred creative ideas my way, usually all at once, as if my brain were hosting a never-ending art festival. Finishing one project before starting another? Thatâs a lovely theory.
Sleeping Beauty and I also have something in commonâweâre both deeply committed to the noble art of sleeping. đ The only difference is that she needed a curse⌠I just need a pillow! But she has also reminded me that slowing down isnât the same as falling behind. Sometimes the biggest transformations happen while weâre quietly resting, healing, or simply giving ourselves permission to pause.
Whenever life decides to test me, Mulan gently reminds me that courage doesnât always arrive with trumpets and fireworks. Sometimes it simply whispers, âTake the next step.â
And then thereâs Anne Shirley. We have an agreementâI borrow her imagination, and she borrows my ability to overthink absolutely everything. đ Together, we can turn the simplest moment into a beautiful story⌠or a full-length novel that nobody asked for.
See? This is exactly my problem.
How am I supposed to choose just one?
The Best Fictional Character Is the One You Create
The more I think about it, the more I realize that life was never meant to make us copies of someone elseâs story.
Some days need courage.
Some days need kindness.
Some days demand creativity.
Some days simply ask us to be patient.
If I forced myself to live like only one fictional character, Iâd probably be wonderfully prepared for one situation⌠and completely lost in the next.
Why Being Many Characters Makes You Unique
Maybe the real magic isnât finding the fictional character you relate to the most.
Maybe itâs collecting the best qualities from every story that touches your heart, blending them with your own experiences, learning from your mistakes, laughing at yourself once in a while, and slowly becoming someone no book has ever written before.
Because thatâs what makes us different.
Thatâs what makes us adaptable.
Thatâs what makes us beautifully unique.
So donât try to fit yourself into one character.
Be the dreamer when dreams are needed.
Be the reader when wisdom is needed.
Be the creator when the world needs something new.
Be the warrior when life becomes difficult.
And when life surprises youâas it always doesâdonât be afraid to reinvent yourself.
After all, life isnât about becoming someoneâs favourite fictional character.
Itâs about becoming a person who can adapt to every chapter with courage, kindness, curiosity, creativity, and hope.
Why settle for one characterâŚ
when you have the privilege of carrying a little piece of many?
Maybe thatâs exactly what makes you you.
A beautifully imperfect, ever-evolving story that no author could have written better.
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⨠Now itâs your turn.đ¤
Who is the fictional character you relate to the most? Or, like me, do you carry little pieces of many stories within you? Iâd genuinely love to hear your answer. đŚâ¨
